Relationships-Dealing with "Body Art"

NO - THAT ISN'T MY SON - IT'S AN EXAMPLE OF GAUGED EARS AND NOSE RINGS

I really don't want to seem like I am whining all of the time but there are certain "things" I don't understand. I have to preface my statements by telling you that I have 2 tattoos and I have a pierced ear. You may wonder why a 56 year old man has a pierced ear and I can't give you a good reason. I've only had it a year and I'll admit that I was self-conscious getting it done in Claire's with a group of little girls.

My 20 year old son has gauged ears. For those who don't know what gauged ears are, I could put my little finger through his earlobes. They start out small but one keeps putting in larger plugs until they reach the size desired. The holes in his ears are about an 3/4 inch across hence I could put my little finger through his ear lobes. He had wanted to have his septum (nose) pierced with something that he could "flip" up so it wouldn't be noticeable for work as well as another piercing in his upper ear.

I can take my pierced earring out whenever I want to and unless you looked, you would never know my ear was pierced. My two tattoos can be covered easily with a short sleeve shirt so unless I wore a very thin white shirt, you would never know I had them. I did all of this on purpose so they would not be noticeable and would not cause a bad first impression that some people might have if they knew about my body art.

How does one convey that a first impression is a lasting impression. If I were hiring someone and two candidates were present, one with a pair of khaki pants and polo shirt with observable tattoos and gauged ears and the other with a pair of khaki pants and polo shirt without tattoos and gauged ears, which one would I hire? If the qualifications were exactly the same, I would hire the candidate without the tattoos and gauged ears. Even if the candidate with observable body art was just a little bit more qualified, persons of my age group would generally hire the other person. My son says that is not fair and I can agree to some extent but if I have a business and I need someone to represent that business; impressions do count.

My son did get an additional piercing in his ear but not the pierced septum. Why didn't he get his nose pierced. I suggested he not do it as I would then make a gift of the car he drives, make him register that car in his name and then insure it himself. It was an out and out threat and it was probably unfair.

My son is probably the "perfect" young adult. He doesn't smoke but has tried it. I don't know if he has ever had a drink of liquor or spirits but I've never smelled it on him when he comes home. He does not do drugs as he watched what his sister put the family including herself through and vowed never to do that. He doesn't have pre-marital sex with his girlfriend as they want to wait for marriage to give themselves to whomever they marry, if not to each other.

So why did I threaten my son? I did it because, in my opinion, to help him in the future. He would have to hide it somehow for his current job at a well known coffee chain and the ears are hidden by his hair. But someday, he will want to get another job and I don't want to hear how no one will hire him and I can point out the piercings as the reason and it still won't be "fair."