Relationships-Exploring Common Interests

Married couples seem to get into rut with their marriage. There will be a time when you just get too busy with life and before too long you are just living together rather than being a loving couple.

This can be a the rut, where everything, from morning to night, Monday until Sunday, seems to repeat itself. You go to work in the morning, you come home from work in the afternoon, you cook for your children, and you discipline your children. The routine is the same every day. A person has the tendency to get bored and will sometimes feel that the marriage is a total failure and there should be more to life than this.

This is when the couple should realize that they have to explore other areas of interests to prevent this from happening. This does not really have to mean that you should love and/or hate what your partner does… You just have to show genuine interest in every aspect of their interests.

The easiest place to look would be into sports. Does your husband love to play or watch basketball/football/baseball games? Does your wife love to play tennis or volleyball? Maybe it's time for you learn to like or at least tolerate the sport your partner loves. Learn the basics, or perhaps, let your partner teach you and when your partner sees what you're doing, he/she will appreciate it and return the favor the next time.

Other games include board games where you could compete together with your children and have family time together. Puzzles are another option as both of could enjoy working together to complete the puzzle.

Traveling might be another option. Many people love traveling and exploring new places and that certainly would end the boredom. You could take a cruise and just live "life in the slow lane". Another option is to travel by air to get to your destination faster and experience other places and cultures as you travel to Asia or Europe. Traveling can be a way to help the marriage.

Another interest you could both pursue would be interest in each others job. You don't have to be an accountant to learn why your husband is worrying about a few cents missing or a computer programmer to realize why your wife has headaches because the function of this or that is not working. It only takes a few days to learn the basics of what your partner is doing. You don't have to learn it all, just be interested enough in them to realize what your partner is having problems with.

You could also pursue some religious interests. Join groups that will help you or your partner then perhaps you could help others with their problems. This would be fulfilling and a wonderful experience for both of you.

What if your partner is a writer? There are things you could do to help them. If they write articles then do the proofreading. Tell them your opinion on the subject matter. Do your best to understand what he/she writes and form your own opinions on the topic. Writers love criticism, too, since it's one of the ways they'll know that someone has read what they wrote. Criticize him/her or praise what he/she did. It's the only way they'll realize that you've done your "job" of reading his/her article.

No matter what you do, the best thing is to put yourself into your partner's shoes. Learn to love what he/she loves and show some interest in what he/she does so you can learn to appreciate your partner more fully too.